when sentiments arise out of nowhere

wish i never
[lyrics: lourland delumen / music: -%!&pending#$@-]

i wish i never told you the truth
i wish i kept my secret of love
now you know and i miss the way we were
we were the best of friends then, now all is gone.

you care a lot for me like no one else does
the only girl i could talk to for hours, even days
we were so happy when we shared moments, weren't we?
in your heart am i not there? do i have a place?

chorus:
i've been lonely until you came
my grey world was painted with colors of you
couldn't help but fall, but it seems you won't let me in
only friends and nothing more, now i'm lonely again

happiness i never found except with you
you were there when no one carried me
i thought the best of friends could be the best of lovers, too
but you said i was the greatest brother one could ever be

you alone

sometimes you feel alone. sometimes you fail alone. you fall alone. you fool alone.

and you wish alone that you could do things alone no more.

phs-ssc batch '02, the best among the best

october 29-30. villa alfredo's resort, baliti, city of san fernando, (P) -- it was a wonderful high school reunion, because many still believed in the magic of high school memories, whether good or bad, happy or sad. i, for example, didn't miss the opportunity to spend time with my batchmates again (after almost three years since graduation day). actually, it was the first get-together party i've attended, although i've already seen most of them at michelle lee's debut celebration. the food [courtesy of mr. jake zantua, bday boy]. the site - a php1,800 cottage accomodation. the guests - anybody from who's who. the sea - exciting 6 feet and above pools without slides. and the bond. ang saya-saya talaga.

okay, okay.. it didn't actually turn out damn too great. the staff of the resort really didn't want to grant our request to have a videoke machine of our own. kesyo walang bakante. meron po, we said. walang magbubuhat. kami na lang po, we said. hnde n'yo alam 'yung mga wiring na tinatanggal, they said. and so on and so forth of their dumb alibis. tapos, napakahigpit pa. it is forbidden to create noise. anu ba 'yun, kumbento? next time, we should never let ourselves drawn to that place again. it is a lesson. next disaster: there were still some people who failed to connect. they just went there to watch tv. meron ako, they said. some didn't swim. some went to other places. nagsarili. but anyway, the hell wit' them. nobody tells them not to. but at least, for the effort of still believing (as i've said)... thank you to all!!!

it is very nice to know that a group of people out there have known you and half of your teen years. nice to know that a group of individuals share the same memories. memories that taught us. memories that enabled us. to fight. to accept. and to establish our presence in this universal void of human consciousness. thank you to pampanga high school for our birth. for the friendship that bloomed, and will continue to do so for a lifetime.

a tear trickles. i wipe it. feels good.